To Couchsurf or not to Couchsurf?

…that’s the question.

Especially for many of us travelers, it can be difficult to find accommodation in a new city or country. Hotels might be ridiculously expensive or hostels just don’t exist (particularly in small towns). It’s not just a matter of getting to your destination safely, but also having a roof over your head for the night (and no, that doesn’t mean sleeping in the train station!).

This is where Couchsurfing comes in– as the name goes, you can literally crash on someone’s couch for the night (or two)…for free! All you need to do is either post a public trip on your Dashboard or send individual requests to the locals to get a place. Of course, you’ll more or less be staying with the host, but in exchange for shelter, you can pay it forward with a home-cooked meal, a night out at the bar, and/or good conversation.

I forgot how I’d first heard about Couchsurfing, but all the same, I created my profile in 2015 and so far have Couchsurfed with close to 30 hosts from all over Europe. I’ve also used it to connect with non-hosts, whether it was meeting up with fellow travelers for a day visit or attending local Couchsurfing events for cultural exchanges. Over two years later, and I’m still going strong!

Of course, just like with any social network, there are concerns about privacy and safety. Especially as a female, it can be particularly precarious, since many of the hosts who respond are overwhelmingly male, some who might be using it to take advantage of you (e.g. sex, dating, etc.). There’s definitely the idea of “Sex-surfing” within the community– mutual or not, it’s definitely not the intended purpose of Couchsurfing. I admit, I’ve gotten dozens of strange requests from potential hosts, but it’s a matter of reading their References in detail and trusting your instincts– if the person seems shady, then don’t accept them as your host!

While I’ve never personally been in danger while Couchsurfing, I’ve at times had hosts who were…odd. Some were socially awkward or had weird house habits, but there were also moments when we just never quite got along personality-wise. Thankfully, the majority of my experiences have been good, and I still stay in touch with some of them today.

Getting that first Couchsurfer to host you is the hardest part– especially if you have zero References on your profile, potential hosts cannot vouch for your reliability, which makes it less likely for you to find a place to stay. However, by finding the right person, you’ll get that first Reference and then it gets easier from there. Having a solid profile is also part of the equation, so that people can know you better even if you don’t have References yet. Putting yourself out there really helps– likewise, having a detailed profile of the host is useful, too!

My first ever Couchsurfing experience was in December 2015: it was my first year teaching in France and I wanted to visit the UK and Ireland for my winter holidays. Dublin was my first destination, and I was fortunate to have found a host to stay with. We’d communicated beforehand to meet in the city center near the Spire of Dublin, so we met there and walked to her flat, located some 40 minutes outside of the center. While not centrally-based, it was still manageable to head into town on-foot. My host, who was a Chinese girl who had studied in Dublin and was now working in the city, lived in a small room in a flat-share with three other people, some even families (as I’d heard couples talking or children crying in the adjacent rooms). Her room was tiny, as there was really no space to put my luggage (except on these small flights of stairs) and no couch: I ended up sleeping in the same bed with her for the two nights I was there, which wasn’t what I’d expected, but nevertheless it was fine. Aside from visiting the Decorative Arts and History Museum together the following afternoon and having  film-and-dinner nights, we didn’t go any deeper than polite chitchat. She was nice, but that was about it. Overall, I’d say that my first Couchsurfing experience was fairly neutral, but more so in the good way.

However, that didn’t deter me from continuing to Couchsurf extensively that first year in France. After Dublin, I continued to stay with hosts in the rest of Ireland and the UK, in cities like Cork, Glasgow, Edinburgh, and Dover. Later, I stayed with hosts in other countries, including Germany, Switzerland (which saved me a LOT of money), and France. Especially in France, it helped me to improve my French tremendously, as I used it to speak with my hosts.

My hosts were a blend of natives and expats: I’ve stayed with French hosts in France, but I’ve also stayed with people from Mexico and New Zealand who were living in the country for their studies or work. In Cork, I stayed with a woman from Belgium and a Russian man while in Zurich. Many of my hosts were men, although I’ve had a couple of female hosts. There were some whom I immediately clicked with and others not so much– in the end, though, we were cordial with each other, which is the least you can do when staying in someone’s home for free.

Couchsurfing isn’t for everyone; it’s especially not for those who expect lavish, hotel-like trimmings. It requires adapting to a new layout and different rules, along with respecting the host. Don’t always expect a couch to crash on: I’ve slept on air mattresses, Futons, actual beds, yoga mats, even the floor! Many hosts don’t always live in the nicest apartments in town, as some are super cramped or lack certain amenities that you’re used to at home (e.g. Wifi, privacy, cleanliness, etc.). However, it’s for free, and it’s up to you to decide whether to accept it as simply a place to crash for the night or to fork over extra money for a hotel.

There’s so much more to say about Couchsurfing; I could especially go on and on about my crazy stories while staying with certain hosts, but I think I’ll leave that for a “Crazy Travel Story” segment (or two). While not perfect and not for everyone, Couchsurfing remains a great place to meet people from all walks of life: it really challenges you to become more open-minded about others, all the while learning more about yourself and your capabilities in relationships. I admit, it was a huge learning curve when I first started out, but now it has gotten a lot better. Couchsurfing has taught me so much about people, how to interact with them, and to make myself a better person in return.

Have you ever Couchsurfed before? Would you do it or not? Let me know!

 

— Rebecca